Corrupt-a-Wish: Cubing Edition

[DavidWoner]

Granted, but everything is broken when it arrives.

I wish I could get a pyraminx that doesn't suck after 100 solves.

 

[fanwuq]

Granted, but everything is broken when it arrives.

I wish I could get a pyraminx that doesn't suck after 100 solves.

Granted.
I wish I could get a pyraminx that doesn't suck after infinite solves.

 

[DavidWoner]

Granted, but it sucks until you do infinite solves.

I wish cube4you stickers didn't suck after 100 solves

 

[Lorenzo]

granted, it now sucks after 1 solve.

i wish my cubesmith order would come now!! i live in CALI and my Cube4You order came within a week with GROUND SHIPPING!!!
(sorry, need to get it out of my system.)

 

[JTW2007]

Granted, but he sends you the wrong sets.

I wish I knew Roux.

 

[qqwref]

Granted, but for some reason you are terrible at blockbuilding and you never get a solve under a minute with it.

I wish I was really good at Square-1.

 

[KubeKid73]

Granted, but everyone else is better than you.
I wish someone granted my last wish.

 

[Ethan Rosen]

Granted, but everyone else is better than you.
I wish someone granted my last wish.

granted, but they took those words to mean they would grant the last wish you ever make before you die. One day you failed a test and in the brief depression that comes after failure, you said "I wish I was dead." The details of what happened afterward aren't important, but let's just say that truly was your last wish.

I wish I could drive after 9:00 PM.

 

[waffle=ijm]

granted, but you would be on salvia
i wish i had chocolate

 

[KubeKid73]

But what if I wished I was alive forever and then shot myself? That would be the last wish of my life, but then it would be granted, so I would come back to life, so it wouldn't be the last wish of my life making me die again, etc. creating a paradox. You can't drive after 9:00 PM? Here, for the license for under 18 (I'm guessing that's what it is.) its not past 12:00.

Granted, but it's butt chocolate.
I wish I could fly. (That was the wish that I wanted someone to grant.)

 

[fanwuq]

granted, but it's slower than walking.

I wish I can solve the 4x4x4 faster than you can solve the 2x2x2.

 

[JTW2007]

Granted, but you DNF every competition solve and your camera fails every time you try to record it.

I wish I didn't keep forgetting to make a wish at the end of my posts. I've edited both.

 

[KubeKid73]

At least its faster than a traffic jam.

Granted, but the wish is that you would die and the topic just turned into Wish and you can't corrupt any more wishes.
I wish the world record for 7x7 multi-blind (10 of them with one hand, two at a time.) was set by Seymour Butz.

 

[ThatGuy]

granted, but afterwards you lose one hand for wishing this

i wish i could do a backflip onto mirror blocks

 

[KubeKid73]

Granted, but you have to do it of the Empire State Building and you will die if you don't land perfectly on the Mirror Blocks puzzle.
I wish that you don't land on the puzzle.

 

[DavidWoner]

Granted, but he lands on you instead.

I wish for 3 more wishes.

 

[ThatGuy]

granted, but you'll die after all of them are used

I wish the MB are still intact after KubeKid's body is all over them so I can actually have it

 

[JTW2007]

Granted, but you slowly go insane from the stress of owning an object that killed someone.

I wish I knew Guimond, AVG, and K4.

 

[tfkscores]

Granted, but after finished learning them completely you jump in the air and hit your head on something (bad imagination) and get knocked into a coma and wake up forgetting how to solve a rubiks cube.

I wish I could go from barley under sub 20 to under 10.

 

[ChrisBird]

Granted, but then you die.

I wish I could eat more pie.