How to type semi-proper english on a forum in a nutshell

[Poke]

I think the use of language on many forums, including this one, has degraded severely. I understand the occasional typo, or tongue-tie, but when I read through a post and cannot understand the message, or have to re-read it, that makes me angry.

Here are 5 things to ask yourself before hitting the notorious 'submit new thread' or 'post reply' button(Main points and mistake examples in bold/underlined):

1. where are the cApital Letters?
When you start a sentence(Right after a period, exclamation point, or question mark), there should be a capital letter. Also, proper nouns such as New York, or Virginia should be capitalized. 'I' should be capitalized while 'me' should not be capitalized. Proper names should also be capitalized.
Improper: "if it were Me out there, i would try harder."
Proper: "If it were me out there, I would try harder."

2. Where did I put the punctuation.
This one is simple. There should be a period after every complete thought, a question mark after a question, an exclamation point after an exclamation, and commas to break up run on sentences and lists.
Improper: "Why is it that you do not understand why I am the best I am the biggest fastest and strongest."
Proper: "Why is it that you do not understand that I am the best? I am the biggest, the fastest, and the strongest."

3. Wherearethewordsspaced?
This is an unusually obvious and easy concept which should not be overlooked. You need to hit the Largest button on the keyboard(Thank you for reminding me of other layouts, changed it to make it non-discriminant). There should also be A space after punctuation(Thank you for bombarding me with that one).
Improper: "I really enjoyeating alot of food."
Proper: "I really enjoy eating a lot of food."
Any suggestions for better examples on this one, tell me... no need to point out this one being a failure.

4. Is my words making sense, maybe?
Another simple concept. Do not put words like 'maybe' at the end of a sentence. Plural words should have 'are' in front instead of 'is'. If you reread a sentence and you have trouble understanding it, chances are, we will not understand it.
Improper: "Is you sometimes the one who maybe has tooken my pretty watch, maybe?"
Proper: "Are you the one who sometimes steals my lovely watch when I am not looking."

5. Do I use quotation marks?
I don't even care if you punctuate correctly around the quotation marks, because there are a billion rules. But if you are saying he said, "this," or she said, "that," at least let us members of the forum know that you are saying what someone else said. In addition to this, if you are trying to tell what someone said do not type, "He said, "That I was supposed to."" If you use he said that or she said that, please do not use quotes.
Improper: 'I remember when you said "that I was a terribly awful person"'
Proper: 'I remember when you said, "You are a terribly awful person."'
OR: 'I remember when you said that I was a terribly awful person.'

6. Do I use proper words? (Thank you, mcciff2112)
This one particularly annoys me. Using words(not) like "u" instead of "you" is terribly annoying. Another one that catches my eye is "wat" instead of "what." Would it kill you to hit the H key every now and again?
Improper: "Wat r u doin tonite wen i am at the stor?"
Proper: "What are you doing tonight, while I am at the store?"

I hope this guide has given you the motivation to type in a slightly more clear, more precise English which may prevent blindness from all the squinting to try to overlook errors.

If you are one of the people for whom the post was created, thank you for reading... really... thank you for hopefully trying to absorb something out of this.

If you find any errors, or things which must be added in this post, please tell me.

Edit: I just noticed, my title is an epic fail... run-on.

Typed proper and improper usage of sentences, as suggested by jacob15728.

 

[Samlambert]

No offense, but reading this nearly made me cry. You made so many mistakes it's not even funny. Some obvious one: "2. Where did I put the punctuation.", "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people".

It's somewhat ironic that you are trying to teach us how to type in proper English when you are making so many mistakes.

Still, thanks for trying, I'm sure some people will get something out of this.

(Epic fail on the title btw)

 

[Poke]

No offense, but reading this nearly made me cry. You made so many mistakes it's not even funny. Some obvious one: "2. Where did I put the punctuation.", "4. Is my words making sense, maybe?", "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people".

It's somewhat ironic that you are trying to teach us how to type in proper English when you are making so many mistakes.

Still, thanks for trying, I'm sure some people will get something out of this.

You passed the test. I bolded AND underlined those mistakes, if you were paying attention.

Edit: *facepalms self* Maybe you opened it before I bolded/underlined my mistakes.(but again, so obviously on purpose.)

 

[Samlambert]

No offense, but reading this nearly made me cry. You made so many mistakes it's not even funny. Some obvious one: "2. Where did I put the punctuation.", "4. Is my words making sense, maybe?", "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people".

It's somewhat ironic that you are trying to teach us how to type in proper English when you are making so many mistakes.

Still, thanks for trying, I'm sure some people will get something out of this.

You passed the test. I bolded AND underlined those mistakes, if you were paying attention.

Edit: *facepalms self* Maybe you opened it before I bolded/underlined my mistakes.(but again, so obviously on purpose.)

What about "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people". then?

And yes, I posted before you underlined.

Im not trying to be rude btw, Im just trying to save you from a massive Pochmann ownage.

 

[Poke]

No offense, but reading this nearly made me cry. You made so many mistakes it's not even funny. Some obvious one: "2. Where did I put the punctuation.", "4. Is my words making sense, maybe?", "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people".

It's somewhat ironic that you are trying to teach us how to type in proper English when you are making so many mistakes.

Still, thanks for trying, I'm sure some people will get something out of this.

You passed the test. I bolded AND underlined those mistakes, if you were paying attention.

Edit: *facepalms self* Maybe you opened it before I bolded/underlined my mistakes.(but again, so obviously on purpose.)

What about "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people". then?

And yes, I posted before you underlined.

It's Almost(Thank you for pointing out again, BTW) 1 AM... and I need something to do... they will be fixed.

I need to quit posting in my semi-conscious state.

 

[Samlambert]

No offense, but reading this nearly made me cry. You made so many mistakes it's not even funny. Some obvious one: "2. Where did I put the punctuation.", "4. Is my words making sense, maybe?", "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people".

It's somewhat ironic that you are trying to teach us how to type in proper English when you are making so many mistakes.

Still, thanks for trying, I'm sure some people will get something out of this.

You passed the test. I bolded AND underlined those mistakes, if you were paying attention.

Edit: *facepalms self* Maybe you opened it before I bolded/underlined my mistakes.(but again, so obviously on purpose.)

What about "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people". then?

And yes, I posted before you underlined.

It's after 1 AM... and I need something to do... they will be fixed.

It's after 1 AM

(Should be past, not after)

 

[4Chan]

Yayy, I've noticed that speedsolving as a forum is changing, ever so slightly.
More arguements, and many stupid posts.
Like religion threads. D:

As more members join, there are younger members who are inherently less mature due to their young age.

Im glad to see that people are now paying attention to grammar, like other major internet forums.

 

[Poke]

No offense, but reading this nearly made me cry. You made so many mistakes it's not even funny. Some obvious one: "2. Where did I put the punctuation.", "4. Is my words making sense, maybe?", "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people".

It's somewhat ironic that you are trying to teach us how to type in proper English when you are making so many mistakes.

Still, thanks for trying, I'm sure some people will get something out of this.

You passed the test. I bolded AND underlined those mistakes, if you were paying attention.

Edit: *facepalms self* Maybe you opened it before I bolded/underlined my mistakes.(but again, so obviously on purpose.)

What about "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people". then?

And yes, I posted before you underlined.

It's after 1 AM... and I need something to do... they will be fixed.

It's after 1 AM

(Should be past, not after)

Thank you for pointing that out... I'm performing terribly on my english right now, I meant to say almost.

 

[Samlambert]

Thank you for pointing that out... I m doing terribly on my english right now, I meant to say almost.

At least you are trying, unlike about 90% of the users in this forum.

Btw, it should be "in this post" (in your first post)

 

[Poke]

Thank you for pointing that out... I m doing terribly on my english right now, I meant to say almost.

At least you are trying, unlike about 90% of the users in this forum.

Found a mistake in that sentence... at least I think... performing terribly sounds better than doing terribly anyway.

Btw, it should be "in this post" (in your first post)

Why must you assume that I mean "inside" and not "on top of"?

 

[Samlambert]

Thank you for pointing that out... I m doing terribly on my english right now, I meant to say almost.

At least you are trying, unlike about 90% of the users in this forum.

Found a mistake in that sentence... at least I think... performing terribly sounds better than doing terribly anyway.

I would've said "my English is terrible right now" instead, sounds much better.

 

[Poke]

You have the right to your own opinion.

 

[Samlambert]

You have the right to your own opinion.

"You have the right to have your own opinion"

 

[Poke]

You have the right to your own opinion.

"You have the right to have your own opinion"

I like my way better. I'm gonna keep it.

Edit: I'd be the one cross examining all of your English errors if I wasn't so tired at the moment. Or maybe you would still Poke at every one of my little errors.

No offense, but reading this nearly made me cry. You made so many mistakes it's not even funny. Some obvious one: "2. Where did I put the punctuation.", "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people".

Found one: Your sentence should be, "Some obvious ones"

 

[mcciff2112]

Thanks for doing this. It's about time someone took the time to make a thread like this. I think I might explode the next time I see another "u" instead of "you."

 

[Poke]

Thanks for doing this. It's about time someone took the time to make a thread like this. I think I might explode the next time I see another "u" instead of "you."

I'm taking that as a suggestion.

 

[Samlambert]

You have the right to your own opinion.

"You have the right to have your own opinion"

I like my way better. I'm gonna keep it.

Edit: I'd be the one cross examining all of your English errors if I weren't so tired at the moment. Or maybe you would still Poke at every one of my little errors.

No offense, but reading this nearly made me cry. You made so many mistakes it's not even funny. Some obvious one: "2. Where did I put the punctuation.", "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people".

Found one: Your sentence should be, "Some obvious ones"

Tell that to my english teacher, she's the one that insisted that it wasn't taking an s when some was preceeding, even though I found it quite strange I took her words for it.

Oh btw, "if I weren't" "English errors"

 

[Poke]

Why do I even take your advice? Your location says Canada, and I'm from hillbilly land, so what is to say I do not speak a different dialect?

 

[Samlambert]

Why do I even take your advice? You're location says Canada, and I'm from hillbilly land, so what is to say I do not speak a different dialect?

Unless you are from a very specific location, I'm fairly sure you are speaking a different "language" and not a different "dialect".

Also, my primary language is French and if you don't want to take my advices that's your problem, but looking at your mistakes I'd consider them.

Oh and by the way, You're location

It's 1:31 AM now, so I'm going to bed. Try not to fail that bad next time.

 

[Poke]

Why do I even take your advice? You're location says Canada, and I'm from hillbilly land, so what is to say I do not speak a different dialect?

Unless you are from a very specific location, I'm fairly sure you are speaking a different "language" and not a different "dialect"

Also, my primary language is French.

Oh and by the way, You're location

It's 1:31 AM now, so I'm going to bed. Try not to fail that bad next time.

I know I'm getting loopy when I mix up your and you're... night.

EDIT:

Why do I even take your advice? You're location says Canada, and I'm from hillbilly land, so what is to say I do not speak a different dialect?

Unless you are from a very specific location, I'm fairly sure you are speaking a different "language" and not a different "dialect".

Also, my primary language is French and if you don't want to take my advices that's your problem, but looking at your mistakes I'd consider them.

Oh and by the way, You're location

It's 1:31 AM now, so I'm going to bed. Try not to fail that bad next time.

"...if you don't want to take my advices..." Could be right, but I've never heard it that way.

You have the right to your own opinion.

"You have the right to have your own opinion"

I like my way better. I'm gonna keep it.

Edit: I'd be the one cross examining all of your English errors if I weren't so tired at the moment. Or maybe you would still Poke at every one of my little errors.

No offense, but reading this nearly made me cry. You made so many mistakes it's not even funny. Some obvious one: "2. Where did I put the punctuation.", "If you find any errors on this post, or additions, please tell me.", "If you are on of the people".

Found one: Your sentence should be, "Some obvious ones"

Tell that to my english teacher, she's the one that insisted that it wasn't taking an s when some was preceeding, even though I found it quite strange I took her words for it.

Oh btw, "if I weren't" "English errors"

English is capitalized because it is a proper noun(a a language, at least).