Bingus Ringus McDingus
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- Mar 7, 2023
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WARNING: MUCHO TEXTO
This was written nearly all on my own, with a minimal amount of AI assistance in giving me the idea.
In the quiet corners of a dimly lit room, three cubes sat atop a wooden table. Their vibrant stickers gleamed under the flickering light, each harboring secrets of countless solves. These cubes were no ordinary playthings; they were legends—the the gods of a recent, yet passed-by, era.
1. The QiYi Valk M: The Hollow Warrior
Once upon a time, cubers whispered tales of the QiYi Valk M. Its name and its distinct sound echoed through competitions with the clarity of a silver trumpet. The Valk M was the favored companion of speedcubers seeking precision. Its hollow corners and soft magnets held secrets—subtle, yet potent. When Mats Valk himself endorsed it, the cubing world bowed in reverence.
The Valk M danced across fingers, its turns smooth as silk, crunchy as a crumbling cliff, and stable as a stone. Corner cutting? Impeccable. But its magnets—oh, those delicate magnets—were like whispers in a storm. Some yearned for stronger bonds, while others reveled in the subtlety. The Valk M was a symphony of control, a sonnet of speed. Yet, as the years passed, newer contenders emerged, casting shadows upon its legacy.
One may hold it as the holy grail of the singular hand, its soft clicks bowing to the yield of the handicapped solver, however ephemeral that handicap may be. Yet its full power may never be realized by most, with the dream of Mats Valk being left behind in the dust.
2. The MoYu GTS2M: The Clack of Thunder
Beside the Valk M stood the MoYu GTS2M, a cube with thunder in its heart. Its clacky turns reverberated through competition halls, announcing its arrival. The GTS2M was a beast—fast, furious, and unyielding. Its magnets, like miniature lightning bolts, snapped pieces into place.
But the GTS2M had its quirks. Customization? Limited. With solely a screw and a lack of other springs, the light-footed nature remained steadfast within the confines of uninspired hardware options. And corner-cutting? Perhaps it could have yielded more to the aggressive commands of its leader. It pauses, pauses, pauses in times of need.
But the clack of its turns echoed in dreams, but whispers of newer innovations teased the horizon.
3. The GAN Air SM: The Weightless Dream
Lastly, the GAN Air SM perched on the edge of the table. Its honeycomb design whispered secrets of aerodynamics. Lightweight, it floated like a feather on a summer breeze. The Air SM defied gravity, its turns soft, almost ethereal. The magnets—subtle as moonlight yet strong as a solar flare—guided its path. And it innovated where no others would dare to think, with a mood oft determined by a multitudinous amount of colored springs.
Yet it wasn't all ideal. In essence, it refused to move on from a past era: holding onto its old shield of stickers with no intent on moving on. In addition, though the corners cut through with the power of some angular angel, it faced a dilemma of control, with people finding that it refused to yield when pressed yet darted away with the slightest provocation. And some found it too weightless, like chasing shadows. The Air SM danced lightly, but some craved substance. Cubers wondered if it would vanish with the morning sun. Still, it was a dream—a fleeting waltz across algorithms.
But let bygones be bygones. It is a rare specimen, and it grants its delicate nature to a lucky few.
But what next?
The old legends watched from their wooden pedestal. They whispered to each other, reminiscing about their heyday. The Valk M yearned for stronger magnets and a boost of speed, the GTS2M wished for a full angle of cutting, and the Air SM pondered its weightless and rough existence, both in availability and in heft.
And so, the cubing saga continued—a symphony of progress, where each cube played its part. The legends remained, their stickers fading but their stories etched in cuber lore. As for the modern releases? They danced alongside, eager to carve their own chapters.
And who do I choose?
I pick the GTS2M. The discipline entailed brings along a sense of respect, a relic of a past era bringing back a reverence unattainable by the newer, more polished era. To train with the GTS2M is to train with control, to train with accuracy, and to train with honest effort. I hope to gain a respect for modern technology in newer faces with the strength provided with discipline.
This was written nearly all on my own, with a minimal amount of AI assistance in giving me the idea.
In the quiet corners of a dimly lit room, three cubes sat atop a wooden table. Their vibrant stickers gleamed under the flickering light, each harboring secrets of countless solves. These cubes were no ordinary playthings; they were legends—the the gods of a recent, yet passed-by, era.
1. The QiYi Valk M: The Hollow Warrior
Once upon a time, cubers whispered tales of the QiYi Valk M. Its name and its distinct sound echoed through competitions with the clarity of a silver trumpet. The Valk M was the favored companion of speedcubers seeking precision. Its hollow corners and soft magnets held secrets—subtle, yet potent. When Mats Valk himself endorsed it, the cubing world bowed in reverence.
The Valk M danced across fingers, its turns smooth as silk, crunchy as a crumbling cliff, and stable as a stone. Corner cutting? Impeccable. But its magnets—oh, those delicate magnets—were like whispers in a storm. Some yearned for stronger bonds, while others reveled in the subtlety. The Valk M was a symphony of control, a sonnet of speed. Yet, as the years passed, newer contenders emerged, casting shadows upon its legacy.
One may hold it as the holy grail of the singular hand, its soft clicks bowing to the yield of the handicapped solver, however ephemeral that handicap may be. Yet its full power may never be realized by most, with the dream of Mats Valk being left behind in the dust.
2. The MoYu GTS2M: The Clack of Thunder
Beside the Valk M stood the MoYu GTS2M, a cube with thunder in its heart. Its clacky turns reverberated through competition halls, announcing its arrival. The GTS2M was a beast—fast, furious, and unyielding. Its magnets, like miniature lightning bolts, snapped pieces into place.
But the GTS2M had its quirks. Customization? Limited. With solely a screw and a lack of other springs, the light-footed nature remained steadfast within the confines of uninspired hardware options. And corner-cutting? Perhaps it could have yielded more to the aggressive commands of its leader. It pauses, pauses, pauses in times of need.
But the clack of its turns echoed in dreams, but whispers of newer innovations teased the horizon.
3. The GAN Air SM: The Weightless Dream
Lastly, the GAN Air SM perched on the edge of the table. Its honeycomb design whispered secrets of aerodynamics. Lightweight, it floated like a feather on a summer breeze. The Air SM defied gravity, its turns soft, almost ethereal. The magnets—subtle as moonlight yet strong as a solar flare—guided its path. And it innovated where no others would dare to think, with a mood oft determined by a multitudinous amount of colored springs.
Yet it wasn't all ideal. In essence, it refused to move on from a past era: holding onto its old shield of stickers with no intent on moving on. In addition, though the corners cut through with the power of some angular angel, it faced a dilemma of control, with people finding that it refused to yield when pressed yet darted away with the slightest provocation. And some found it too weightless, like chasing shadows. The Air SM danced lightly, but some craved substance. Cubers wondered if it would vanish with the morning sun. Still, it was a dream—a fleeting waltz across algorithms.
But let bygones be bygones. It is a rare specimen, and it grants its delicate nature to a lucky few.
But what next?
The old legends watched from their wooden pedestal. They whispered to each other, reminiscing about their heyday. The Valk M yearned for stronger magnets and a boost of speed, the GTS2M wished for a full angle of cutting, and the Air SM pondered its weightless and rough existence, both in availability and in heft.
And so, the cubing saga continued—a symphony of progress, where each cube played its part. The legends remained, their stickers fading but their stories etched in cuber lore. As for the modern releases? They danced alongside, eager to carve their own chapters.
And who do I choose?
I pick the GTS2M. The discipline entailed brings along a sense of respect, a relic of a past era bringing back a reverence unattainable by the newer, more polished era. To train with the GTS2M is to train with control, to train with accuracy, and to train with honest effort. I hope to gain a respect for modern technology in newer faces with the strength provided with discipline.
