Non-Cubers say the darndest things!

Whenever someone asks for my cube because they say they can solve it, I ask them HOW they solve it. Only like 1/50 people who say that actually CAN solve it.
 
I know some people at school who can solve a 3x3, even though it's beginner, and me, using a weird F2L (consisting of middle edges then corners) and 4LLL, they say "You're doing it wrong" when I'm solving F2L and PLL :fp.

Well, at least they CAN solve it, unlike so many idiotic posers.
 
*takes out a 1x1x1 cube (nonfunctional, i say this because there IS a fully functional 1x1x1 cube. edges-only cubes are ftw) and gives it to a random person*

Me: Solve it.
Them: Wtf am I supposed to do with this?
Me: ...solve..it..
Them: Grr, it's already solved!
Me: No it's not. Now solve it.
Them: What the....forget this. *walks away confused*
Me: Tehe...I like to confuse people :D
 
The most hilarious (for me) "synonim" of scramble I heard was (Note: it might not sound as hilarious in English, I did a translation) scatter.
 
"I havn't mixed it up very much"

"I'll just take the stickers off and put them back"

"Is that a Rubik's Cube? But it says Cubesmith on the side"

"I used to be able to do that. You just...hmm...yeah. I used to be able to"

"OMG A bit just fell out! I'm so sorry!"

"Hey! Have you got one of those 360 degree Rubik's Cubes? They're just the same. I've seen it!"

I bet you can't get alternate colours on every square, you know, like a chess-board?"

"*Stares*"

"Oh my god! That must be a world record or something"

"What did you use? WD-40 or something like that?"

"Lol. You said lube"
 
Just last night, this 50 year old woman told me she had solved the cube many years ago. I asked about how she developed the solution, what approach she took. She said, "That was over 20 years ago! You can't expect me to remember anything about that!" I got the same story from someone else last year. Each time I hear it, I find the story hard to believe. I spent a good couple days trying to solve it when I first got it, and never forgot the approaches I took. I figure the only way a person can forget the experience is if they eventually got a bit lucky on the last layer, then got lazy about trying to find a general solution.
 
Given how popular the cube was in the 80s, and how few people seem to have actually figured it out by hand, I think that anyone who did figure it out back then should have a pretty good idea of what to do (at least a general "I solved the puzzle by layers" type of idea) even if they don't remember any specifics. Unless you're talking to the kind of person who regularly solves puzzles that other people think are insanely hard, the solver really ought to remember any triumph that important and difficult.
 
While I don't have many non- cubers at school since I started thid whole trend, there are ALOT of noobs. One's like "I use full OLL and PLL". I then see him using Dan Brown method.

And of course, I reign supreme at cubing in my school. I beat people with my OH when they use 2H.
 
Only slightly off topic: I have occasionally taken a REALLY loose 3x3 that I rarely use to work... one time a coworker was messing around with it and it fell apart. (It was THAT loose... pop=total disassembly)

She completely freaked out...
Her: OMG OMG I am sooooo sorry... I will buy you a new one, I am going to walmart on my lunch break!!!
 
ZB_FTW!!! said:
Avg5: 32.505 (σ = 1.21) Best Time Non-Lucky: 24.976. Lucky: LL SKIP!!! 11.984!!!!!

Why is there a . after 24.976? And why does your LL take more time than your F2L?
 
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I can only solve 3 sides. WTF LMAO LOL OMFG ROFL!!!!!!!!

Do M' U M' U M' U2 M U M U M U2... BAM! 3 sides solved.

Yeah, you can solve only 3 sides, but if you can solve three sides, you're probably good enough to solve the whole thing.

If they brag about 4+ sides, then it is obvious that they are lying.

Mhm, after 1 I don't believe them, but it is possible to solve 0, 1, 2, 3, 4 or 6 sides. Just pointing that out.
I know people who can solve three sides. with luck. Coz I've showed heaps at my school how to solve 3x3's, but they get confused by the last Steps. The 8 move "Algorithms" they say putting emphasis on the word are too long in their opinion. Imgine their faces if I taught them parity algs on the 5x5.
 
I can only solve 3 sides. WTF LMAO LOL OMFG ROFL!!!!!!!!

Do M' U M' U M' U2 M U M U M U2... BAM! 3 sides solved.

Yeah, you can solve only 3 sides, but if you can solve three sides, you're probably good enough to solve the whole thing.

If they brag about 4+ sides, then it is obvious that they are lying.

Mhm, after 1 I don't believe them, but it is possible to solve 0, 1, 2, 3, 4 or 6 sides. Just pointing that out.
I know people who can solve three sides. with luck. Coz I've showed heaps at my school how to solve 3x3's, but they get confused by the last Steps. The 8 move "Algorithms" they say putting emphasis on the word are too long in their opinion. Imgine their faces if I taught them parity algs on the 5x5.

I would say that solving 1 side is extremely easy, even for someone with no cube experience whatsoever. It took me about 20 minutes to get the first layer within 20 seconds everytime, with no help at all. To solve 2 sides requires taking apart the first side, changing something, and then putting it back (most times) which I think would be incredibly hard for someone to do without solving most of the cube.
 
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