Non-Cubers say the darndest things!

Not technically a non cuber thing but it's still in that category.

*I scramble my cube*
Girl: Can I play your Rubik's Cube?
Me: *play?* Sure
*Girl solves F2L using LBL, and inserts several corners into the wrong slots before correcting it*
Girl: How do you get the next part?
*demonstrates now to get EO*
*Girl takes cube back and completely solves it from there*

I'm so confused
 
A couple weeks ago, I was cubing for a bunch of people at my school during a summer camp I was helping out at. We were talking about scrambles and another helper (not a cuber) told me that to get really good scrambles you need to use the Google virtual cube... lol.
 
Non-Cuber: Oh, i can do them
Me: Oh ok ill give you a few minutes
*hands over cube*
*4 mins later he has nothing done*
Me: its been four minutes, you have nothing done and have made like 10 moves
Non-Cuber: Oh i might do it later, my dad was at the world championships
Me: where was that?
Non-Cuber: idk, he didn't tell me
Me: oh ok, well when was it?
Non-Cuber: idk, he didn't tell me
Me (thinking): wtf??
 
Non-cuber: I have a friend who can solve a rubiks cube in 4 seconds
Me: Oh, is he Feliks Zemdegs?
Non-Cuber: ?
Me: Lucas Etter?
Non-Cuber: ?
Me: What's his name?
Non-Cuber: I don't know, he's my dad's friend
Me: What's his name?
Non-Cuber: I don't know, my dad said that's classified information
 
Ooooh boy, new 3x3 world records always end up with a lot of these.

I'm proud of my response to this guy, lol:
2017-09-03.png
 
Non-Cuber: Oh, i can do them
Me: Oh ok ill give you a few minutes
*hands over cube*
*4 mins later he has nothing done*
Me: its been four minutes, you have nothing done and have made like 10 moves
Non-Cuber: Oh i might do it later, my dad was at the world championships
Me: where was that?
Non-Cuber: idk, he didn't tell me
Me: oh ok, well when was it?
Non-Cuber: idk, he didn't tell me
Me (thinking): wtf??
You should have asked what his name was and looked it up.
 
this happened today,
i met two idiots while cubing

Idiot 1: WOAH, Can i mix it up?
Me: Sure
Idiot 2: You know, we made it to the regional championships
Me: Oh cool, i didn't know it existed
Idiot 1: it was like a team thing
Me: Interesting
Idiot 2: we won with a average of 1 minute
Me: I average 25 seconds
Idiot 1: it was solving a 20x20
Me: ***, if you're a cuber you would call it scrambling and not mixing it up
 
this happened today,
i met two idiots while cubing

Idiot 1: WOAH, Can i mix it up?
Me: Sure
Idiot 2: You know, we made it to the regional championships
Me: Oh cool, i didn't know it existed
Idiot 1: it was like a team thing
Me: Interesting
Idiot 2: we won with a average of 1 minute
Me: I average 25 seconds
Idiot 1: it was solving a 20x20
Me: ***, if you're a cuber you would call it scrambling and not mixing it up
I wonder why people feel like they have to lie.
 
(in a public bus ......a man to his friend after i solved it the first time in front of him)
Hey, u saw that, he solved all the colours in the thingie ...i cant even do 1 side...(the cube)........(stop it man..its just like i have solved it a billion times till now)

another one:why dont u have a rubiks brand cube.....dident they make it in the first place(looking at us if we are beggers and we dont have money to buy one)
 
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So a few days ago during lunch period at school, I was sitting by myself in the middle of the cafeteria (I like sitting alone sometimes) when this group of girls walks up to me while I was cubing. Later, I go to throw out my lunch tray, and I come back to find that they had tried to scramble the cube and had popped it. When I popped the piece back in and started the solve, I heard one of them whisper, "Did you see how fast he put it back in?" I internally LOL'd just a little bit.
 
Non-Cuber: *Memorized long sequence of moves
Here, solve this
Me: Solves using CFOP
Non-Cuber: HAH! You have to do it the LONG way!
*Continues making fun of me for a good 5 minutes
Non-Cuber: It was only scrambled with 2 moves

The corners were solved, but all the edges were completely mixed up.
 
Non Cuber: what's your PB (on 5x5x5)
Me:1:26
Non Cuber: mines 1:20
Me: what's your WCA ID
Non Cuber goes off and comes back.
Me: OK what's your name
Non Cuber: ummmmm.....
Me: (silently pwleased ahead doesn't pretend to be feliks it someone) I then type in his first name then WCA and it comes up with some Indian Cuber.
Non Cuber: (pretends to be him) face with I'm better than you
Me: so you went to mathsoc open 2017 in Delhi
Non Cuber: yeah, I went with my uncle actually.

In someways it's fun proving them to be liars.
 
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